It’s Not My Fault!

Not My Fault

Don’t you hate it when your kids say that? Here are two more I could live without: “I didn’t know!” and “It’s not fair!”

We live in an “It’s not my fault” culture, more today than ever before.

I have been reading articles the past few months (including this one) that make strong cases that among the large shifts in our culture since the 1960s, one of the biggest is the trend minimizing personal responsibility. These articles point out that the big “self-esteem” movements born out of the “feelings movement” in the 1960s have slowly taken a deep root in our culture. Having coached thousands of kids for the past two decades, I can verify wholeheartedly, with no reservations, this is a fact. Click here to see why this has happened.

Experts say that through a combination of cultural “norms,” every child in the country is at “high risk” for acquiring the idea that personal responsibility is not that important, which is why I bring it to your attention today. One journalist listed television, some social media, government policies, public education, the college campus, and news outlet media as the primary sources bombarding the minds of Americans, with the idea that personal responsibility is some ancient, outdated garment to be cast aside. She challenged the reader to watch Disney TV and listed the shows to watch. So I tried it … for 15 minutes (it’s all I could stand).

I could not believe how right she was. I counted 14 times (basically one per minute) where a character in the show indirectly or blatantly stated that the “situation” was not their fault, and “it wasn’t fair.”

To me, the idea here is simple: Personal responsibility is at the very core of a life of value. I am not interested in raising kids who are dependent on others or need “maintenance” on their self-esteem … I want to produce productive citizens who pull their own weight and, if necessary, the weight of those who think it’s not fair!


About Kris Hogan

With a 16-year educational tenure under his belt, Kris Hogan has spent the last nine years working at Grapevine Faith High School in Grapevine, Texas. In addition to sitting on its administrative team, Hogan also pulls double duty as Faith’s head football coach. Hogan also was the subject of Remember Why You Play, a 2008 book by sports columnist and author David Thomas that chronicled the lives, struggles and successes of Coach Hogan and his team. READ MORE→